I hate the term “chick lit”. I hate its dismissiveness, and I also hate that it works only too well in making me not want to read the things to which the label is affixed. I know that I need to work on that knee jerk reaction; in my mind, “chick lit” is stuff like the Shopaholic series (which I hated), and in reality, there is probably a huge variety of books which get labelled “chick lit” but which, nonetheless, I should not write off. Case in point: the Cazalet series by Elizabeth Jane Howard. I binge read all 5 volumes in less than a fortnight, and I quite enjoyed the experience. It was comfort reading at its best. I should mention that a few factors likely contributed to my enjoyment of it, and you should keep those in mind when deciding whether this might be a good recc for you. I am a sucker for the time period (1920-1950) and the genre (upper class family sagas). It reminded me of books like The Camomile Lawn and The Forsyte Saga. If you have read and enjoyed those, you will probably like these novels. There were parts I found a bit slow-going or dull, and characters I liked or cared about less, but it was easy enough to speed-read or skip those parts entirely, and pick up the plot later without any issues.

On a more personal note, the series reminded me of the Jalna books written by Mazo De La Roche. That’s probably not a name familiar to most of you, but she was a favourite writer of my grandmother’s long before we emigrated to Canada. I have fond memories of reading my grandmother’s translated Jalna books as a young teen, which detailed the lives of the Whiteoak family over the better part of a century. (There are over a dozen books in total, and you can still occasionally find them in thrift stores and the like. De La Roche was a hugely popular Canadian author back in the day, but she is hardly known nowadays. I did check Amazon, and it looks like there *was* a recent re-print of the series in about 2010.) I think my grandmother would have loved reading about the Cazalets, since stories about family dramas, secrets, and love affairs — nothing too graphic, but definitely “spicy” — were her favourite. My grandmother used to be a prolific reader, but she is 94 now, and in failing health; so there was a bitter sweetness in reading this series, and thinking of all the books to which she introduced me over the years.

Moving on to articles, can you handle yet another article about Millennials? This one posits that there are two types, those born before 1989 and those born after. As a 1980 baby, I will attest that growing up before the internet was a thing is a big part of my cultural context. I remember getting my first e-mail address when I started university in 1997, but I don’t think I actually started browsing the internet regularly until, literally, the 21st century. In fact, I was just reminiscing with a friend about how we used to register for classes back in those days by — wait for it — calling into the registration line (on our land lines, natch) and punching in the codes for the classes we wanted, praying that we hadn’t miscalculated the order (from most to least likely to fill out quickly). How far we’ve come since then! Of course, it feels like no time at all on my end, but in fact it’s been — gulp! — 20 years. I suddenly feel about as young as the cryptkeeper.

But speaking of technological advances, my binge-watching of John Oliver Last Week Tonight segments on YouTube sent me down an internet rabbit hole of articles about MLMs, which eventually led me to this older article on Racked from someone who tried selling Rodan + Fields. I will freely admit to being fascinated by MLMs, but what I found most interesting about this article was the author’s comments on why she felt uncomfortable with the idea of being a salesperson, a discomfort I share. I won’t lie; there have been times when I’ve felt tempted by some of the advertising pitches I’ve received through the blog, not to mention the lure of affiliate links. I’ve ultimately resisted them all, and most of the time I am perfectly content with that decision. I do occasionally fall into the trap of feeling somewhat inadequate for lack of a “side hustle”, but this article was a good reminder that being a “monetized influencer” would require me to take on an additional role (essentially, a salesperson) which probably isn’t a good fit for me. I wonder if that is a weird and outdated scruple in this day of pervasive social media marketing. If you are a blog reader, does it make a difference to you (in how you perceive the content of the blog or the blogger) if the blog is monetized? Do you feel like you’re being sold to, or is it just blog-reading business as usual? And if you have experiences being a “consultant” for an MLM, I would love to hear about that too!

Lastly, this is not an article per se, but Lainey`s coverage of the MET Ball is worth checking out if you haven`t already. I don`t always agree with her (and Duana`s) red carpet fashion takes, but I enjoy their analyses. This year, I think my fave Met look was Claire Danes — I thought it was wearable but still gave a nod to the theme. I also (oddly? it`s definitely not something I would wear) enjoyed Kerri Russell`s look and I agree with Lainey that she and Matthew Rhys make a very intriguing couple.

Have a great weekend!

As promised, here’s my AMA.

Do you create your outfits the night before or is everything day of?

I actually prepare my outfits at least a week in advance. Or, to be more precise, I create a week’s worth of outfits in advance — which gives me some flexibility in terms of dealing with last minute issues that might impose specific requirements (e.g. wear a blazer on Monday because I have a client meeting, versus Tuesday when I’m at my desk all day, etc.). Because weather is not a huge variant in my day-to-day life (I have a short commute and an A/C-ed office, and don’t go outside at lunch on a typical day), it doesn’t play much of a role in my decision-making process.

I find this process helps a LOT. I am always rushed in the mornings (who isn’t) and this helps to simplify my routine immeasurably. I *hate* having to dither over what to wear, which is what tends to happen with me when I’m short on time and the kids are running amok around me. I also read somewhere that one of the keys to being productive is eliminating as much inessential decision-making as possible. Our brains have finite “juice” and they don’t discriminate between important decisions and unimportant ones; ideally, you want to use your cognitive processing capacity on the important, high level stuff — not exhaust your brain with the other stuff. So the recommendation is to develop as simple a routine as possible, wherever possible, that involves minimal choices. For example, I do my make-up the same way every morning, I eat the same things every morning, and (as noted) I have all my outfits already picked out ahead of time. So, every morning, I expend very little brainpower on getting myself ready, which leaves me more “brain power” once I’m at work to tackle my to-do list.

I love your thrifting posts, you have amazing luck. Any tips?

I’ve touched on this before, but a lot of it is out of your hands and has to do with luck. I happen to live in a city where thrift stores are plentiful, and people donate a ton of amazing stuff. That’s not always the case, and I feel your pain if your thrift scene is not great to begin with. That said, there are things you can do to make the most of it. Going frequently definitely improves your odds, because there is no set schedule for when thrift stores will get new stuff in — they get it all the time. That’s not to say that dropping in constantly is an option for everyone, but I would say that checking in at least once or twice of month can make a difference. The other big “tips” I have are: (i) train yourself to recognize good fabrics by touch and/or sight (practice makes perfect) because this will make it far easier to browse quickly and hone in on potential “scores”; (ii) shop by section if you are easily overwhelmed by too much variety, and stick to one or two sections per visit; and (iii) never thrift without your friend, Google. Listen: I learn about new brands all the time, and I’ve been obsessed with fashion for a LONG time. If you find an item that looks and feels nice, but has a label you don’t recognize, Google it — if could be a real gem.

And here’s another pro tip: if the brand label has been cut off, look to the inside tag (where the care instructions usually are). There, you should find one or both of the RN and CA numbers. The US and Canadian federal governments have databases where you can look these up to find which companies they belong to. [Google “RN database” and it should be one of the first results. Google really is your friend.] In most cases, that will tell you who the manufacturer is … although, sometimes it can be confusing. Case in point: remember that mystery label dress I mentioned in my last thrift post? I looked up the RN number and it came up as Urban Outfitters. It seemed strange to me, because the dress certainly seemed more likely to be Anthro … until someone told me that UO owns Anthro. Believe it or not, I hadn’t realized that before. See: I learn something new every day.

How tall are you and what size do you wear? Do you find clothes that fit off the rack easily from thrift stores, or do you get items altered often?

I am 5’7, with a long torso and short legs. I wear a variety of sizes, which I don’t think is helpful to list if the goal is to give you a sense of how things fit me. Sizing is all over the place these days. I had not taken my measurements before, but in the interests of science … here goes: 35-27-38. I think that qualifies me as an hourglass, although I am definitely more bottom- than top-heavy.

I thrift A LOT, so finding things that fit (more or less – more on that in a moment) is not difficult. There are occasions when I might come across a piece that is simply too large, and if I love it enough, I will buy it knowing that it will need alterations. Since those can get expensive very quickly, I don’t do it often – only twice this year, off the top of my head.

Going back to fit: that is, to some extent, a question of personal preference. For things like tops, dresses and skirts, I don’t mind pieces that fit a little more loosely on the body. In fact, I prefer it. I don’t like things that are too body-conscious, especially when it comes to workwear. So I’m a more loosey-goosey with fit than other people might be. When I’m thrifting, I’ll still buy a size 8 dress even if the size 6 would have fit me better. On the flip side, I’m less likely to buy a size 4 dress if the size 6 would have been more comfortably roomy, because I prefer to save the Spanx for very special occasions only.

What are your tips for cleaning your thrifted items, such as dry clean only items and shoes?

Discovering the Woolite home dry-cleaning kit has been a game changer, you guys. It does a great job of “refreshing” clothes, although it won’t get rid of stains. I try to limit my thrifting to pieces that are new or like-new, so stains are not much of an issue. (As far as that goes, check the armpits of clothing, blazers in particular. It’s a good giveaway for wear/usage, and it’s something that even regular dry-cleaning may not be able to address.)

As for shoes, I stick to leather ones and those are a breeze to clean. You can use Lysol or rubbing alcohol, and gently the rub the inside of the shoes with a cotton pad. Let it air dry, then repeat once or twice. I’ve never had issues with the alcohol affecting the leather insole. I would be reluctant to buy shoes that are lined in fabric, or things like Birkenstocks, only because I’m not sure how I would clean them.

Getting scuffs off patent leather exteriors is almost impossible, so keep that in mind when thrifting. Unless the scuff is very fresh (in which case vigorous rubbing with soapy water and/or alcohol may work), there is nothing that can be done about it; at some point, the dirt/ink/whatever sinks below the patent film on the leather, and it becomes permanent.

What’s your skincare routine?

Honestly, I’m still figuring that out. Until recently, I used Kirkland brand face wipes to clean off my make-up at night, and L’Oreal Revitalift cream to moisturize in the morning. And that’s it, save for the occasional exfoliation with St. Ives apricot scrub. I mean, it’s a miracle I don’t look like a Shar Pei at this point. Luckily, I am rarely exposed to the sun (and I use SPF 60 for those rare occasions — I’m talking about the white, goopy stuff), and my skin isn’t super fussy (not too dry, not too oily, not acne-prone, only slightly sensitive).

However, I have started getting interested in Asian skincare, which is probably a terrible rabbit hole-slash-money pit, but anyway … where was I? Ah yes, new stuff I’m trying out. So far, an oil cleanser, a toner and a moisturize/milk. I’m not sure of their names, so here’s a pic instead:

I can’t say that I’ve noticed any major changes in my skin yet, but I haven’t had any adverse reactions either. I will say that the toner is not astringent at all, and it does make me miss my old Mario Badescu toner which they sadly don’t import into Canada anymore, and whose name I have now forgotten. (It was a yellow liquid, for what it’s worth.) That one was gentle but did leave me with a “clean face” feeling which this Hada Labo version doesn’t. In all fairness, I have read that Asian toners are not all that similar to N. American ones — i.e. they serve different functions. Any Asian skincare experts, please feel free to jump in here.

I am also using Tony Moly sheet masks once or twice a week, and I love them — mostly for the experience (I find it relaxing) than for any skin benefits … although I do find my skin to be extra soft immediately afterwards. I have ordered a few more products on Amazon, including a Biore sunscreen and a different Softymo cleanser, and will report back if anything turns out to be a hit.

Your closet seems overrun with Anthro stuff. Why don’t you go for higher end designers, especially now that you’re trying to be more minimalist?

Because of the change in my shopping habits over the past year or two, my closet is currently as much a reflection of my style as it is of my thrifting abilities. I am definitely becoming more selective about which brands I buy, but the high end designer stuff tends to be harder to find, and I have a hard time resisting the other cute things I come across in the meantime.

How did you start finding your fashion voice? I feel lost with mine and constantly buy things that just aren’t me. Any advice?