I’m sure you’ve seen those posts on social media listing 5, 10 or however many things people wished they knew when they were younger. We all have those lists, don’t we? In fact, I’m sure our lists are far longer and broader than what can be covered in an average TikTok, and they likely include things both profound and superficial (but nevertheless useful). It got me thinking about what my fashion-related list would be. Let’s take a look!
Proportions matter. Like a lot of other Gen X/Millennial women, I had a complicated and at times fraught relationship with my body for years. I thought about it, and what it looked like, a LOT but in retrospect I have to wonder whether I actually saw it at all. It wasn’t until relatively recently that I began to figure out some basic but pretty important proportions. I have a long torso, a fairly high-set waist, and violin hips (or “hip dips”) – things which explain why the low-rise trends of the early 00s were a nightmare for me, and also why I look great in high-waisted, flowy bottoms. I also have a comparatively short inseam for my height, which is why cropped pants and petite length bottoms work best for me. I was nearly 40 years old by the time I was able to perceive these aspects of my body clearly and without judgment, and at the same time understand how they impact the way clothes fit me. Before that, whenever clothes didn’t fit properly or didn’t look “right” on me, I always assumed there was a problem … and that problem was something to do with my body. This is, of course, nonsense. All bodies are wonderful and different. If a piece of clothing doesn’t feel right on the body, it’s the clothing that has to change, not the body.
Ignore sizes. Clothing sizes are bullsh*t. The sheer inconsistency means that they are worse than useless as a guide to fit. At the same time, the arbitrary societal values associated with sizing means that they can be very harmful. I remember reading, as a young adult, “tips” in magazines about cutting out the size label from your jeans so no one would know what size you wore. Every time I am reminded of that, my mind boggles afresh – that we could be so concerned about something as utterly improbable as a stranger catching a glimpse (somehow?!) of a tag on inside of our clothing which might (somehow?!) tell them something relevant (!?!?) about us.
But leaving aside that broader discussion, sizing is practically worthless. What matters are measurements: depending on the garment in question, things like shoulder span, bust, waist, hips, rise, inseam, etc. These things tell you how something will fit on your body (assuming you know your own proportions and corresponding measurements). This is very helpful because fit is actually very subjective. For example, just because size A technically fits me, doesn’t mean size A is what I want – perhaps I want that garment to fit more loosely on me than intended by the designer, in which case I am going to need size B. If I know measurements, I am in control and I dictate fit – the clothing doesn’t dictate to me.
Get a steamer. I’ve always hated ironing. Some people love it, good for them. Buying a high-quality steamer changed my life. I tried a cheap version many years ago, and thought the whole thing was overrated because that steamer couldn’t take out any wrinkles to save its life. Fortunately, I gave steamers another try, spent a bit more money, and got a professional-quality product (Jiffy). It works incredibly well – and fast! – on almost all fabrics; it won’t turn out a shirt as crisply as an iron, but that’s not a drawback for me (I don’t wear dressy shirts very often). Steaming is quick and easy and, as a bonus, can kill most nasties, and refresh clothing between washes.
Learn quality. I wrote about this before, but being able to recognize quality by sight and touch was another game changer for me, especially as a dedicated thrifter. My knowledge of the fashion industry and history is fairly extensive, but I don’t know everything – far from it. The best way to learn is by recognizing what you don’t know … and then reading up about it. It’s happened more times than I can count: I come across a piece that feels good to the touch, see a label I don’t recognize, and Google it – and discover something special and/or add to my store of brand knowledge.
OxyClean for the win. I used to avoid white shirts like the plague – not just because I’m a spill-prone klutz, but also because I was afraid of yellowing. And then I discovered OxyClean and the white shirt fears were history. I could probably expand this into a whole “learn proper laundry care” thing, but I’m by no means a laundry expert, so I will simply add: most of your clothes should not see the inside of a dryer, and if that’s unavoidable, use the lowest heat settings. Laundry care is the key to making things — even fast fashion — last, and is so ignored/underrated.
Nothing (or everything) is timeless. Timelessness is a lie. Not to get philosophical with you, but nothing in this world is impervious to change. Especially fashion! Chasing timelessness in clothing is looking for perfection that doesn’t exist. I am all for mindful consumption, but I am skeptical of things that reek of marketing ploy aimed at obscuring the true nature of what is being consumed. Quality, (true) sustainability, ethical production, things that make your heart sing – these are things worth paying for. Timelessness isn’t worth an extra dime.
Save everything. Okay, this one is maybe not really practical but speaking of the cyclical nature of fashion: everything comes back in style! I don’t have a lot of regrets when it comes to the clothing I gave up over the years, but those few regrets I do have … they are strong! I definitely have become more mindful, not only about what I bring into my wardrobe, but also what I discard. Quality is going down all the time, so the thrifts aren’t going to be a goldmine forever; I plan to rely more and more, in the future, on my archive closet — bringing things in and out of my current wardrobe as trends cycle through.
Terriffic advice. Thank you.
Hi Adina! Thanks for the tips. I’d like to add a bit to your sizing comment. I work in retail sales and find that a lot of women don’t think they can go outside the height recommendation for sizes. Often times people only think about the length of the sleeves or pant legs, but there’s so much more to it. The rise on pants and the placement of the waist are different too. I’ve had several tallish women who benefited from wearing a petite dress because a higher waist is so much more flattering. I’ve also had some shorter women who need to buy regular sized pants because they need the longer rise. Of course you’d still need to have the pants hemmed and you’d have to consider if a petite dress may be shorter than you’re comfortable with. I hope that helps someone!
This is SUCH a good point! thank you for bringing this up because I definitely think it will help some people. It’s important just to think outside the box of “I am size Y”.