Cast your mind back three years ago. Like many (most?) others, I was trying to fill my pandemic lockdown schedule with “keep busy” projects; one of the most dubious was probably at-home haircuts. First, I gave myself bangs. Then, not put off by the unimpressive results of that effort, I decided to ask my husband to cut my hair. My husband, bless him, is a man who tries to please me and who is also generally optimistic. The foolishness of my request wasn’t immediately apparent to him – I wanted a blunt, short bob, “just cut it straight across, babe”, what could go wrong – but it became painfully obvious 5 minutes in. I have fine hair … but a LOT of it. An hour and a half later, we called it a day – not because my haircut was truly finished (or even) but because my husband’s nerves gave in.
It was … fine. I mean, nobody was going anywhere or seeing anyone, so it was fine. But, almost immediately, I began to regret cutting it and decided that I wanted to grow it out. All the way. This was not exactly out of character. I’ve always been the person who changed her hairstyle every year or two. What was different this time was that … I just kept growing it. In the past, I’ve usually swung from pixie cut to shoulder-length bob and back again. The last time I had hair that went past my shoulders was 2015 or so (and 2006 before that). As soon as my hair starts kissing my shoulders, I get the itch to cut it. This time, it was different. By Christmas 2020, my hair was nearing shoulder-length and I felt … nothing. No haircut itch. A lot of that had to do with the pandemic; I was burnt out (weren’t we all) and in the middle of another lockdown, there was no opportunity to try to find a new hairstylist even if I wanted to. And so, I kept going and growing. And growing and going. By November 2021, my hair went past my shoulders and was long enough to allow me to try a middle part, which was A Thing that The Youths were doing at the time. I got a few compliments on it and that was apparently enough for me to DOUBLE DOWN again.
Fast forward to now. My hair is well past boob-length (which had been my goal at one time) and inching closer to the small of my back (a new goal?). I sometimes look at photos from my “cute bob” years and I love the look … but, still, I feel no desire to get the chop. I am way overdue for a trim, but laziness (and a lack of split ends) is conspiring against me even on that front. “I really need to do something about a trim” is something I tell myself every month. And every month, my hair gets longer.
Ok, but enough about my hair growing journey; this post isn’t about that. Hah! Sorry! Are you still reading?
Here’s what I wanted to say: hair is one of the most overlooked and underrated elements of personal style. Maybe that’s just me overlooking and underrating, though. I’ve always thought of hair as a key factor in the context of “personal appearance” but never in connection with what I wear. Recently, it struck me how well my current hairstyle complements what I enjoy wearing these days – which is quite different than, say, 3-4 years ago – and I was struck by a chicken-and-egg question.
Have I been growing out my hair because (subconsciously) I wanted it to line up with the vision of my current style? Or has my current style evolved in a certain direction aligned with the evolution of my hairstyle? Honestly … I don’t know. A bit of both, perhaps. When I started to grow out my hair, my love affair with Ralph Lauren – the prairie and the preppy – was still a long way in the future. Certainly now, however, I am less inclined to consider changing up the hair because it does suit my current aesthetic so well.
I think it helps to see some visual evidence, because that’s what got me thinking about this. Let’s start with Asymmetrical Pixie Cut Adina. Most of my outfit photos from that era unfortunately don’t show my face, but these are pretty representative.
And here is Mermaid Hair Adina:
Quite different, eh? Here’s another example, this one from my Short Blunt Bob era. Can you imagine this outfit with long hair?
Or this one with a short, blunt bob?
It just wouldn’t have the same impact.
Becoming conscious of the impact of my hairstyle feels like unlocking another tool in my outfit-building toolbox, which is nice. There are ways that I can style my long hair to either accentuate its “boho” vibe (those mermaid waves, for example) or to make it a little more “edgy” (a funky ponytail). But even my most edgy outfits these days hit different than in the past — there is a softer, more romantic, less architectural side to them. Which, in my current era, I’m perfectly happy with.
Hi Adina – This post really got me thinking. My style has evolved several times over the years, but most recently I have gone in the opposite direction from you – from a more boho style with a cardigan for nearly every occasion to one more streamlined: softer corporate clothing (I LOVE unlined but shaped jackets), fewer prints other than the occasional stripe or plaid, etc. At the same time I went from a heavily layered hairstyle that encouraged what natural wave I have to a shoulder-length angled bob worn pretty straight. Part of this is the evolution of my career, from individual contributor to vice president; there are expectations about what a VP in a finance area is supposed to look like, and it rarely involves delicate floral prints. There is a congruity between hair and clothing that seems to need to exist – soft, wavy hair doesn’t work with solid-colored, architectural clothing, while a sharp strict haircut doesn’t work as well with a soft fabrics, prints and pattern mixing.
Ahhh .. that’s the word I was looking for, congruity! I totally agree.
This is interesting – and the photos really bring the point home. As someone with very fine hair that does not (in my view) work great long, I’ve been pretty consistent with a blunt, angled bob. And now I’m wondering if that has influenced my clothing style choices somewhat – or if knowing that my style choices work well with that haircut (I’ve never, personally, been really into the RL prairie stuff, for example) means that I’ve never really felt much interest in growing my hair long. Much to think about!