A comment from my best friend on an old OOTD photo that came up in my Instagram archive recently got me thinking about the ways my approach to fashion has changed since I started this blog back in 2010. Not the way my personal style has changed – though, whew, what a journey that has been, eh! – but, rather, the way I think about fashion itself. Let me explain.
When I started this blog, fashion was something very much Apart. It wasn’t even aspirational — it felt unattainable and, frankly, mostly irrelevant to my daily life. Oh, I was interested in clothes and dressing nicely. But after more than a decade of reading fashion magazines (from my teens through my 20s), I felt alienated by capital F fashion. I couldn’t afford it and, besides, why does a woman from a “backwater” city need to concern herself with what’s happening on the runways in Paris or New York? Reading about fashion was like reading about, I dunno, the Kardashians.
As I began to pay more attention to clothes, and began to be more invested (literally) in my appearance just as my professional career started to take off, things shifted a bit. I dipped a toe in the designer world – also literally. Designer shoes and bags began to be of interest to me. I never questioned this much at the time. It made thrifty sense; bags and shoes made out of leather can last forever (assuming proper care), they’re not vulnerable to size fluctuations or trend fluctuations, and so on. Looking back, I think this was a reflection of my general approach to fashion: it was still, to a large extent, a utilitarian thing, a tool. I used clothing to look nice and professional. I wanted clothes that flattered my body shape (relatively easy most of the time, since I wore straight sizes) and made me look polished. Conventional advice for the latter goal is: invest in good accessories. [Think about it: even men get told to spend more money their shoes, watches, etc.]
Sidebar here, but I think there was also a class element involved in this. I haven’t thought about it much, and maybe I’m way off-base. For what it’s worth, I think that “investing” in shoes and bags in particular was appealing to me, in part, because they were the most conspicuous status symbols available to me. I grew up poor, and didn’t start having much disposable income until my late twenties. Even then, I wasn’t making “big law” money, so I had to be strategic about my spending. Having a “good” bag seemed like the easiest way to elevate my mall brand outfits and achieve that “polished” professional look. There is a lot to unpack in that, including the very concept of what “polished” means and looks like, but that is another topic.
In the last few years, my approach to fashion has undergone something of a paradigm shift. I started to think about style critically; it became a form of creative self-expression. The next part did not follow immediately; in fact, I only became conscious of it in the last couple of years. What eventually happened was that I started to develop an appreciation for the “raw materials”, so to speak, of that creative expression. The clothes themselves.
The design. The workmanship. The overall vision of the designer, their aesthetic language.
Clothes became less of a utilitarian tool, and more of an art object. Some of my current favourites are, honestly, almost entirely the latter.
I stopped buying designer bags a few years ago (well, bags altogether for the most part), without really even noticing. They receded into the background of my outfits; became purely utilitarian. I have enough to last me a lifetime, and their design qualities don’t spark nearly the same level of joy and desire as clothes so … buying additional ones doesn’t seem like the best use of my discretionary budget. I’d rather spend it on a really beautiful Dries Van Noten dress.
I have also divorced myself from the concept of looking “polished” — which, I recognize, is a form of privilege in itself — and status symbols are less important to me. I am much more interested in making my own style statements, rather than adopting ones dictated by others.
Anyway, all of this is not to say that my current way of “doing fashion” is better or worse than my old way. It’s just different, reflecting my changing perspectives. Fundamentally, my philosophy hasn’t changed, really: invest in what maximizes your joy. As a sidenote, my fashion spending over the last 5-6 years (since I’ve been tracking it) has fluctuated very little; I know it might seem like I am a Buy All The Things kind of person, but I’m only that way about things that I’m obsessed with (whatever that might be at any given time) and otherwise quite frugal about everything else. I still love a balanced budget above all else 😉
I am interested in hearing how others approach this topic, so please let me know in the comments: how do you do fashion?
Two things happened for me. I started worrying much less about my wardrobe after I moved to a much lower-stakes career that I am, frankly, very overqualified for. I don’t feel like I need to worry about hitting that balance of graceful/serious/smart/elegant/feminine because who is going to tell me that I don’t deserve my job? Practically, this means I am much more willing to wear pink, which is a color that always looked great on me but I avoided because I didn’t want to be seen as unserious.
I also have less wardrobe churn. I think that’s partially from becoming interested in environmental issues and also because I’ve become more conscious of the colors and silhouettes that work for me.
Though, I also hit my mid-thirties, so maybe I just stopped caring more generally about being on trend?
I think that settling into a new role and becoming more comfortable in my job has impacted me as well. And working from home full time now, as well.
I have never cared too much about being on trend, though for reasons that have changed over the years. Now, it’s because I know what I like and I’m going to find it and wear it whether it’s in style or not.
well I don’t do fashion for starter… I do clothes, that fit, that are good quality (ie not in “plastic” but real fabric, vintage and at least european made if not french, which would be the best) and in my style.
By saying I don’t do fashion I mean that I do not really care at all about the trends: in fact, I prefer to stay far away from trends.
Granted, I do not wear clothes from long past eras, but I really do not like fashion any more. It started quite a long time ago. I was raised in a family where my mother used to work in a very famous fashion magazine for women in the fifties, and she sewed, a lot. Both my parents loved good clothes of good quality, with good craftsmanship. Even the hands me down from extended family where, well, good.
So now I don’t really care about the fashionable brands, including the so called ones, if they are not well made, no poly..thing fabric, nor plastic. Same with shoes (and I have a lot!!).
Even if our approach of fashion and clothes is different in Europe (no very large closet, no very large houses, no thing about only wearing it once and then discarding… those are stereotypes in a way, I know), most women are still spending a lot. Average women do not really care about fashion or trends, more about well, clothes! Possessing clothes.
I do possess but I prefer to wear, not to be worn by my clothes. For more than 3 years now, I stopped buying new. And I prefer to get some older brands that I know are still well made, vintage or not.
So really I don’t do fashion. In a way, I think Fashion stopped existing a few years ago: who is really creating now, where are the creators who knew how to sew, how to cut fabrics, how to draw… I wonder!!
Now my aesthetic is closer to what fit me, back to what I was wearing as a young adult, in a boyish way(I used to shop in men’s shop with my suffering father…), with always a lot of real colours (so not very… french!!).
This is especially true as I live in a suburbs where there are a lot of migrants to whom consuming and having a lot of cheap clothes from Primark is a must. Well they do as best as they can as poverty is still there, even more now. So I still feel privileged that I am able to buy and also that I am educated about fashion, about quality, about fabrics… thanks to my parents, my italian grand mother…
But what about your own background, i think I remember that you were from european background too? Does it still have any impact on you or are you definitely and totally north american on that matter, or of mixed “heritage”?
Another question to you.
I’ve lived in Canada for 25 years now, since I was a teenager, so my outlook on fashion (to the extent it’s subject to external influences), is probably entirely North American. My post title was a bit tongue-in-cheek, but what I was trying to say was: how do you engage with the fashion industry? Probably should have worded it better.
Anyway, I do think there is still creative expression happening in fashion today but that isn’t the primary driver of the industry itself, I agree. I am interested in what designers with a point of view put out on the runways, although their pieces don’t usually end up in my closet, haha! I just find that it inspires me to think of my own clothes in new ways (new combinations, new silhouettes, etc.). But, at the same time, I am not really interested in trends per se. I also agree that we should wear our clothes, not the other way around. I love my clothes, but they’re my tools for self-expression; they shouldn’t dictate the message.
I love these meditative posts.
I consider the fashion industry with it’s seasons, trends, and the breathless pursuit of the new an opponent attempting to seize my disposable income. I buy out of season and on sale classic pieces and try to wear them into the ground. I started popping by when we were both buying formal work togs and trying to make them interesting and don’t pop by much now because we aren’t very aligned.
I’m sorry to hear that. Over time and with life changes, the blog has probably changed more than I realized, and I can see that it may not resonate for some as much as it used to. There is a lot of inspiring content out there, I’m sure you will find stuff that aligns more with your own experiences.
This is a very interesting topic, and I appreciate your thoughtfulness about it. I also grew up poor, which I think has profoundly shaped my attitude about clothes and what to spend on. I am also tall, and tall sizes for women are more available now than they used to be, thankfully. I spent too many years in ill fitting garments that were from discount stores and feeling self conscious because I wanted to look good but settled for plain. But now that I’m in my 40s, I’ve finally figured out what I like, what flatters, and what is reasonably comfortable for my job that requires me to be standing and moving all day while still looking professional. And now that some of the trends from my teen years are coming back, I know not to waste time on them and stick with what makes me feel good, even if it’s not what is currently in the fashion magazines. I think age and experience is key to a person finding their style.
100%
I used to feel overwhelmed by fashion magazines and fashion shows, and now I can flip through the images and find the stuff that I know works for me/suits my style and ignore the rest.
I have enjoyed seeing your style develop over the years, clearly you are able to express yourself so much in your fashion and it shows when you enjoy it.
I have a construction industry-adjacent job so wear a lot of jeans and polos now on site visits and my WFH-wear is almost exclusively yoga pants and sweaters now. Seeing you continue to pull all the stops out is really inspiring. I have been trying to refine my WFH so it is a little less pajama-adjacent and more kooky art teacher (and spending a lot of time on Poshmark and trying not to buy any more new clothing). This will probably continue until we can leave the house regularly again and see people, I realize now how much I do dress for others, not just myself.
I definitely also dress for others, but what I realized this past year is that the way I dress when I do it for others, is different than when I do it for myself. It’s been an interesting discovery, for sure.
I feel somewhat the same way about my early interest in handbags being partially a class thing. (I didn’t grow up feeling like I didn’t have access to fashion because of money. Though I mostly grew up around people wealthier than my family, conspicuous fashion status symbols weren’t really a thing there! But after I went to college and then law school I began to feel more aware of not being as well-off as some of my peers, especially in law school.) And then once I was in law school especially, there was also a lot of worrying about having the right “look” outfit-wise to fit in in the profession.
As I get more established in my career, I care less about making sure to have the right “look” in work clothes. There are still some potential jobs I could take later where it would matter sometimes (mainly for appearances before a jury) that I dress in very conservative business formal, a look I don’t enjoy wearing. But outside of that kind of thing, I’ll wear what I’m comfortable in, even if it may not be quite formal enough or is a little unusual for my setting.
These days, my main priority with how I approach fashion is to look for what I will enjoy wearing and getting use from. That’s mainly a question of materials, color, fit and whether the design suits my body shape. (I do kind tend to stick to my sartorial comfort zone, and I try not to buy too much because I know I tend to reach for the same favorite items over and over again, so my wardrobe isn’t necessarily the most interesting thing to look at!)